Part of me wants this breeze to run through deep down my soul and a part of me wants to hide behind the walls. Part of me rolling under the lust of wandering and for a part of me running back to home is all it wants.
A part of me wants to dive to a vast, blue frosty ocean; touch the coldest part, shivering to the soul and a part of me is afraid to be felt drowning all alone.
A Part of me still long for every single touch of yours with all the love instilled, and a part of me wants to turn over the days to ensure we had never met at all.
And I don’t know what I want.
You might find me as fearless and selfish – because you see I do not get afraid of things you do. I don’t worry about if the sky will fall or the earth will burst into pieces? I do not pay attention to people you do? Why should I concern to these when I have my own plate in front of me? Fully embellished!
I have fears but they’re my own, hidden, melded under my skin and that your sightless eyes cannot see. I fear about letting things go that hurt me the most, I fear about falling for what I love, I fear to fight, I fear to cry, I fear to believe, I fear to be called stupid with no judgment skills, I fear to be heard and I fear to move on.
I have fears that scare me to death – but I have the courage, unflinching hope, deep humility and the resilience to live with these. And this do the magic, this makes me FEARLESS to you.
I’m cold and sour sometimes; sometimes ostensibly fleecy like snow. Drowning sometimes under the veneer of memories while sometimes swaying over the ocean all alone. Sometimes I run away to defy these hollow conventions and then being pulled back again with my laborious soul.
I am starving severely for love at moments and sometimes crave for not being adored anymore. Sometimes preaching morality is my utmost desire and sometimes I’m cruelest the most.
I am neither good nor bad; I am lost somewhere in between. I am lost somewhere in between.